Pen, Paper, & Pixels

Twinkie - A Delicious Log of Joy

2012-01-12T14:05:00.002-05:00

I thought I would never make one of these, but these are words that need to be shared.

Wonder Woman Sketch

2011-11-23T11:51:00.001-05:00

Warm up sketch with Easy Paint Tool SAI.

Batman vs. The Joker - Aftermath

2011-10-15T00:34:00.002-04:00

Batman has caught the Joker...again.Time to drag him back to Arkham.

Silly Joker.

(SAI and Photoshop)

Batman Sketch

2011-10-12T21:41:00.001-04:00

This here is a sketch I'm working on. "Batman: Year One" is getting released on DVD the 18th, so I have Batman on the brain lately. I hope I don't lose my motivation. I would like to see this finished.

"Liberated" Male Comic Book Characters 2

2011-09-26T18:28:00.001-04:00

Look, mommy, I liberated Iron Man!

"Liberated" Male Comic Book Characters

2011-09-26T10:17:00.000-04:00

In recent news bubbling through the comic world, DC has claimed to begin "liberating" their women characters. The result is something less liberating and more whoreish.
http://www.comicsalliance.com/2011/09/22/starfire-catwoman-sex-superheroine/

So a few of us over at Comic Dish have started a topic where we try to "liberate" the male heroes. Here is my version of the Joker in all his romance-cover glory.

He wants to show you his guns... all four of them.

An Experiment

2011-08-11T12:06:00.002-04:00

Alex has returned. He will be the focus in an webcomic I will be using as a stress reliever.

http://steel-ink.hauntedstudio.net
http://steel_ink.comicdish.com
http://steel-ink.webcomic.ws
http://www.drunkduck.com/Steel_and_Ink

Poster Concepts

2011-07-31T14:26:00.003-04:00

Comic Dish is currently having a Community Event that centers around designing a promotional poster for your webcomic. Though I haven't even started releasing MONSTER SOUP yet, I decided to join in on the event. I see nothing but benefits from this event.

Here are the first two roughs I came up with.

I'm really liking the last one. I'll try to hammer out some more roughs before I settle on one that I like.

EDIT: Spent more time on their faces.

Comic Yummies

2011-07-30T09:31:00.002-04:00

A glimpse of what I've been working on for the past four months. This is part of the prequel comic for Liz Staley's webcomic "Adrastus".

2011-06-09T22:09:00.000-04:00

I received my copy of Azpiri's Sketchbook today. I've always love his style. Anyway, here's a quick sketch of mine as I attempt to mimic his style, with a little bit of my own flare, of course.

Unicorns Don't Sparkle

2011-06-04T22:58:00.001-04:00

Fur and Fangs

2011-06-02T12:46:00.001-04:00

Working on Pepper's wolf form.

Playing with different styles.

Two More Misfits

2011-05-27T07:26:00.000-04:00

Fun With Shapes

2011-05-12T12:49:00.000-04:00

Fiddling with the characters' basic shapes. Four more to go.

Cyborg Gimp

2011-05-04T19:55:00.002-04:00

Some "Monster Soup" concept art. It's a Gimp Cyborg, or a Cyborg Gimp? Oh well.

He drives a 1932 Bugatti Type 55. Yeah, he's badass.

Portal 2 - Extended Ending

2011-04-27T21:26:00.001-04:00

After finishing "Portal 2" I wondered, "What will happen to Chell now?"

Messy Fun

2011-04-24T17:18:00.000-04:00

An experiment of the messy kind. I've been wanting to step out of my comfort zone for a while now.

Let the Concepts Commence

2011-04-23T10:11:00.000-04:00

Giant Robot, attack!

One Hot And Sexy Batman

2011-03-25T23:37:00.001-04:00

I was sucked into a topic here at Comic Dish that is centered around the exploits of Sexy Batman. I have an alternate version of this image in the thread. (Some of the other images there are on the mature side.)

So this here is the classic shot of the hero walking away from a massive explosion.

Yum.

More Concepts

2011-02-22T22:23:00.000-05:00

More concept art.

Drawing again!

2011-02-19T11:26:00.002-05:00

I was asked by a long time friend of mine to collaborate with her on a prequel story to her comic "Adrastus". Though I'm always hesitant to even think about working on a comic, I really need to face this fear of mine. And who knows, maybe this is what I need to get my butt in gear and work on my own comic.

These here are the first sketches of the four characters the prequel will revolve around. Sketched with a simple Bic ballpoint pen (red) and a mechanical pencil, then inked in Manga Studio. I'm starting to love Manga Studio, and it may be the program I use to make the comic.

Technology Sucks

2011-01-25T19:16:00.000-05:00

I spent an hour today trying to correct the Wacom driver issue with Manga Studio, and it still isn't fixed. (Followed all the guides I could find on the internet.) I have been having the most terrible time getting this comic off the ground. And now things are starting to fall apart. Perhaps I should start small. Do a carefree, simple comic. That way I can familiarize myself with the programs and work out my own process. I need to experiment a bit. But right now, I'm completely overwhelmed to the point where I'm starting to dread working on it. That's not the place I need to be. I want to have fun with this, but all I'm feeling is anxiety and, well, dread. Something isn't right. Perhaps I need to take a step back for a moment. Or perhaps I have been pushing myself to hard.

I do have a manuscript that needs finalized for print. Then there's always the story I worked on for this past NaNoWriMo. This could be the nice break I need. And now my mind switches to the Steampunk story I have in the pipeline. Maybe I need to do what my grandmother says and make a list of the things I want to complete that day. It worked for Uma Thurman in KILL BILL.

Sketch Dump

2011-01-22T22:54:00.001-05:00

Ever since I've hooked up my new 26" LCD TV as a monitor, I've noticed how it would better serve someone who only surfs the net or watches videos. When it comes to art, this LCD TV is lacking in color management. So after I get some type of stand or table for the TV, I'm stuck using it. At least I can hope over to another computer to do color corrections. My goal is to get a new 23" hp monitor I found at Best Buy. But since my funds are lacking, I'll be going back to the square 19" monitor.

Anyway, the first script for MONSTER SOUP is finished. I will be kicking myself into gear to being the layouts. If I can get up to five pages a week, I would call that my comfort zone. It's a lot of work, and I know I can't do the five pages a week to begin with.

Until those pages see the light of the internet, I'll keep posting random sketches.

Yes, I've changed my signature yet again. *sigh* I'm keeping this one, though. It's simple. It looks like a "D" but also a "B", and it also looks like a pitchfork. Works for me.

And for an added bonus, here's the warden from MONSTER SOUP.

Gargoyles make such cute humans.

It's Not Potted Meat

2011-01-20T10:56:00.000-05:00

What started out as a little sketch ended up as this.

I Swear This Isn't Blood

2011-01-15T20:47:00.000-05:00

I've began editing the first draft of MAY THE DEAD SPEAK (Book 2 in the EDEN series). I've been dragging my heels on this one. As with anyone else who writes, they know of the pain I'm talking about. Editing Hell. And it is. My mind gets to this point where I'm scrutinizing every word in a sentence. My pages begin to look like someone has bled all over them. I go so deep into editing-mode that I begin to lose sight of the story, the characters, and what's going on. That's when I have to take a break and mentally smack myself around. I have to slip into the mindset of a reader and not the writer. If it reads well, then move on. I need to stop with the editor mindset. Things tend to sound better when I'm actually reading instead of ripping my hair out over a silly comma placement.

I imagine myself being trailed by a typo demon or monster that pops up when I begin this phase. Sure, I may catch some of my mistakes, or change a sentence around to make it sound better, but this part always runs the risk of creating new typos. I've noticed this with my other books. After I've pulled my hair out over the editing process and managed to get to a place where I feel comfortable, I'll go back months later, grab my printed copy and discover these new typos. My stomach knots. My forehead hits my palm. I'm left feeling like an idiot. Tis my constant struggle with that unattainable goal of perfection.

Maybe I need to cruise the internet for some motivational quotes...

Rebirth of a Blog

2011-01-13T13:59:00.002-05:00

I'm wanting to start using this blog more. I have plenty of others scattered about on the internet cosmos. I have given thought to merging my art blog with this one. Thus the new name here; "Pen, Paper, & Pixels." (Ooo, it uses an Oxford comma.) It's vague enough to encompass writing and art. Works for me!

Now it's time to look at new themes. Something pretty, classy, and sleek.

-Devin Blake

November already?!

2010-11-02T00:45:00.002-04:00

That time of the year again--that mad dash to 50,000 words within 30 days. I've been bouncing back and forth between two stories to write. While I woke up this morning, set on one story, by the close of the day, I switched to the other. I may end up working on both at once. So would that count as 100,000 in one month, or still 50,000? I'll go with the latter. Too bad I can't count blog entries and chats as part of the count! Yeah, didn't think so.

2,000 words a day. That's my goal.

Today's count: 2,453

A New Way

2010-08-09T11:01:00.002-04:00

I'm finally putting my foot down and beginning my adventure into the book called "The Artist's Way." I have tried to do this before, but I was using a PDF version of the book and ended up doing a week's worth of the morning pages. But now, I went to the bookstore yesterday and bought the paperback. Finally, I'm going to begin this process the proper way. I already started back on the morning pages this morning. Man, I hate writing long hand. Writing now on the computer I'm flying through these words. A pen in my hand is so much slower. Talk about lag!

So today I begin reading Week One. What will it have in store for me? When I read the PDF, it was only up to Week One. I think I was waiting for when I purchased a hardcopy. Now that I have it, there will be no more excuses.

I will use this blog to track my progress. Let's hope I can make it through the 12 weeks without throwing in the towel.

*grabs the book to begin reading*

I Write Like...

2010-07-16T18:57:00.009-04:00

Playing around with "I Write Like." There are no scientific methods involved. But it's fun to mess with. :)

Here's the breakdown of my work and the style I was compared to.

"Eden" Part I - Dan Brown ("The Da Vinci Code") *sigh*
"Eden" Part II - James Joyce ("Ulysses")
"Eden" Part III - David Foster Wallace ("Infinite Jest")
"Eden" (all) - Dan Brown *double sigh* (There must be something in the first half that's Brown-esque.)
"May the Dead Speak" - J. K. Rowling ("Harry Potter")
"Four Corners: Masquerade" - Robert Louis Stevenson ("Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde")
"Four Corners: Forever" - Chuck Palahniuk ("Fight Club")
"Four Corners: Legend" - Vladimir Nabokov ("Lolita")

Then I pasted some blog entries to see what it came up with.
Entry 1 - Stephen King
Entry 2 - Bram Stoker

Finally, I typed in this simple phrase, "I like to write. I write books. I love creating." Apparently, that sentence is in the style of Mary Shelley.

Personally, I prefer not to compare myself to any other author. I like to stay in my own head-space and deliver my own screwed up style.

Rain - My White Noise

2010-06-29T11:31:00.006-04:00

When I write or try to relax, I usually listen to the rain and thunderstorm tracks on my iTunes. (Though nothing can really replace the real thing.) I've noticed that it's hard to find good tracks out there to listen to. Either they're too short, too much background noise (birds, planes, so on), or extremely LOUD thunder that catches you off guard. So I have made my own tracks to listen to.

Right click to "Save Link As" or "Save Target As."
These tracks are for personal use only.

Rainstorm (62mb - 192 kbps)
Thunderstorm (62mb - 192 kbps)
Thunderstorm2 (53 mb - 192 kbps)

The first two tracks are the same; one is with thunder and the other is without. The third one listed is actually the first storm track I ever made. I listen to the "Rainstorm" track the most. On my Thunderstorm playlist in iTunes, I have about 7 hrs altogether. I have a strange fascination with storms. I think that's why I get all giddy when a hurricane or tropical storm is looking to strike the Grand Strand.

Free To Read!

2010-06-25T07:12:00.006-04:00

I posted EDEN online to read on June 8th. You can find the link through my main website. I also posted the first twelve chapters of MAY THE DEAD SPEAK, which is a story under OF THE MOON AND SUN. So far I've been have a positive response to this move. This has also pushed me to fill out the series website. I'm working on the Characters area right now. I also plan to have a FAQ section, some dealing with the mythology while the other will focus on the miscellaneous questions I receive.

This brings me to FOUR CORNERS. I plan to bring this series back online, as well! :D Not sure when I will find the time to convert everything to their online format. It will take me a full day of HTML editing for that series. Though only two of the books have been published, I do have a third that's finished and ready to be edited. So much stuff to do. But I will work on this series when I need a break from EDEN.

Switching gears. My cousin is planning to publish the first book in her series called [name removed upon request]. She, however, will be going the traditional route and will be looking for a publisher that way. She expressed how she hopes she won't create a green-eyed monster out of me when/if she gets published. Seriously? She fails to realize something; I'm already published. But this is where self-publishing is looked down upon. Let me clarify. Everyone that follows me knows that I've tried twice to get published the traditional way, even looking for an agent. She says that I gave up too soon. That's not the case. I only changed my plan--my path in the whole publishing journey. I haven't completely tossed out the idea of nabbing an agent or landing that publishing contract with a respected company. The thing is, my method isn't traditional. I doubt any agent or publisher would allow me to post my work online as I write. I need this to help fuel my drive. I got a taste of it when I began publishing FOUR CORNERS online back in September 2000. It was like the webcomics of today, releasing 1-2 chapters a week. I didn't have a set released date at that time, but I hope to use one for my EDEN series. This will give me to drive to meet my deadlines, something I need to get comfortable with. If I can win NaNoWriMo, then I can meet a weekly deadline.

So no, no green-eyed monster here. It just upsets me that indie authors are looked down upon. It's not because we were rejected elsewhere and this is our only option. It is a choice! I choose to be an indie author. I choose to have complete control over my work. I choose to write for myself and not worry about making money. This has never been about making money. It's about writing stories that entertain me and perhaps others. I know I'm not the best writer, but I'm having fun. I've said this before and I'll say it again; too me, it's all about having fun, and if I can entertain others in the process, it's just sprinkles on an already iced cake.

;)

Creative Nostalgia

2010-06-07T09:43:00.005-04:00

I've been thinking again (I know, the doctors told me not to) and I keep going back to the formula that has worked for me. I care more about having readers than selling books. So I'm entertaining the idea of posting my entire works online, free to read, and if they want a hard copy, I have that covered as well. It's like a webcomic idea; post a new page on certain days. I think this is what I need to regain some of my fading buzz. I use to have readers who looked forward to the posting of new chapters. But after I retreated offline to do the whole publishing thing, all of that buzz has faded. *sniffsniff* I get the random email and message every now and then about an old reader of mine who recently rediscovered me.

With posting a new chapter online it also fueled my drive to write constantly. But now, without that drive, I can find myself going days/weeks without writing.

I have weighed the Pros and Cons, and the only major con I see in this; What if someone steals my work? To which I reply, "My work is Copyrighted to me. But it is the nature of the beast." Even books out there on the bookstore shelves are sometimes claimed as plagiarized works.

I need to think of an easy way to convert the chapters into HTML. The old school way I use to do it was okay then, but this will be a mass conversion. I think InDesign has a way to do it. Perhaps an ePub way.

I'm actually excited about this. This may be the refocusing event I've been looking for.

New Project

2010-04-10T11:28:00.005-04:00

To paraphrase the official website, this will be a spin-off of "Four Corners," but will also work as a standalone story. The best way I can describe it the overall feel of the project; "Arcane Machina: Where steampunk meets fantasy."

Official website:
http://am.hauntedstudio.net

Follow the progress here:
http://haloghost.wordpress.com

My Constant Battle

2010-03-23T19:20:00.002-04:00

In writing this blog, I use it as a way to battle my own writing demons. I like to think of this thing as therapy. One of my biggest hang-ups in life is my fear of rejection. I know I have said this plenty of times before, but this fear is so strong that it was dug itself deep into my thought process, and the tiniest things will set it off. This fear is also rooted in my perfectionism. I hate that I can’t seem to get over this insane cycle. So this here is a list I created to deal with these issues.

(This is me talking to myself.)

• “It’s not perfect.” So what. Nothing is perfect. Look at the movie industry. Every movie created has its own share of flaws, and they have hundreds of people working on them. You are one person writing a book with endless possibilities. Stressing over every imperfection will leave you banging your head on your desk until you pass out from severe brain trauma. Whether you consider yourself an author or not, the struggle for perfection is in all of us. The real battle is to march on in the face of mistakes. Again, so what if your work is not without its flaws. The real tragedy would be to give up on your dreams in the shadow of your fears.

• Break the mold. I have seen and read plenty of articles and books that talk about the proper ways of writing (fantasy, horror, so on). But this is where it can go from instructional to opinion with the flip of a page. Anyone can write an article called “The Correct Way to Write Fiction” and go on to explain how you must write. But this is their opinion. The methods and styles of writing are as alive as you and I. You can’t look at writing as a template created by someone and placed out there for others to use as a guide. Break the mold. Take risks. Don’t stop and think, “I’ve never seen it done like that before. Better change it to be on the safe side.” No! This “safe side” crap is for those who fear risks. Be different. Make an impression. Look at it from different angles. Millions of years ago, writing didn’t exist. Writing is human entertainment. But if you fail to entertain someone, it’s not the end of the world. For every person who dislikes your work, you will find others who will salivate for your next installment.

• Make it your passion. Don’t let anyone’s opinions deflate your dreams. If you have a passion for writing, then hold on to it as though it is your last tether keeping you within this world. Your passion should be the air in your lungs and the blood in your veins and all that other clichéd crap. You began this journey for one person—yourself. Ignore the irritating chatter of others. You know what makes you happy, and any attempts to deter you are nothing more than wasted energy on their part.

• Life is too short to be afraid. When you’re laying on your deathbed, looking back at the life you had, wouldn’t you like to say, “I did what I wanted and I have no regrets.” Years pass and you keep saying, “One day I’ll get serious and pursue my dreams.” There is one quote I have posted everywhere to help push me along, which reads, “Don’t be afraid. Be fearless.” This goes back to the opinions fear. What is that one saying I keep hearing… Oh! “Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one.” And that is the beauty of this world: diversity. Everyone has their own opinion, and no matter how much it stings, you shouldn’t use it to grow from. This is very different from constructive criticism, however.

• Have fun. This is the biggest and most important driving force behind your passion. No amount of money can fill the void if there is no fun to be had. This also brings me to another quote I use a lot: “It is better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self.” You have to be selfish about your passion. You have to protect it. Get inspired, entertain yourself, look forward to getting up in the morning and slipping into your “world”.

• Don’t compromise. I have this other fear of disappointing my friends and family. I’m afraid they will reject me because of the subjects I write about. When someone asks about my books and wants to read them, I feel my stomach drop. “They won’t like it,” I tell myself. So when I write, I sometimes hear that voice in the back of my head that says, “Leave that in and your readers will judge you—hate you because of it. Change it! Make it ‘friendlier’.” Well, I’m not much on the friendly side when it comes to creating my characters or stories. I like to think of myself as a sadist god, feeding on the conflict and pain I bestow upon my creations. If I decide to compromise, then I will be doing an injustice to my characters. Their luster will dull and leave a foul aura in my brain.

• Stay connected. Write everyday, even if it’s 100 words. As long as you have something written, it will keep you connected to the story. I like to get at least 2,000 wpd (words per day). Though most days I end on something around 300. But 300 words is still a word count! It still keeps you connected to your story. Don’t fret over the small things; “Does this sound right? Should I add more here? Is this comma really needed?” This isn’t writing, this is editing. Editing should come after the darn thing is finished. Just write and move on. It’s like that one story in the Bible. Don’t look back or you’ll turn into a pillar of salt. (Paraphrased, of course.) So don’t reread until you’re finished, and then editing madness can begin. It always seems to be the case when you go back to something you have written a while ago, read over it with fresh eyes and start to see the things that need changed. So ignore that stray comma. It will scream at you later when you have that red pen in hand.

I really can’t think of anything else. I probably repeated myself many times in this post, but I need to get it through my thick skull.

Now it’s time to slip into god mode and torment my creations.

Storms of the brain.

2010-02-12T12:09:00.003-05:00

I had planned to finish the first draft of the story I started this past NaNoWriMo, but things never work out the way I plan. So what have I been up to? Outlines and brainstorming. Hours and hours of losing myself within the lives of these screwed up characters. What's going to happen? What will they show me? Forget what I want them to do, that never works.

This brainstorming carries me onto research. I'm currently swamping myself with articles and documentaries on Stonehenge and the people from that time in history. My parents and teachers could never persuade me to do this kind of work in school. But now it's fun. I love learning all I can about a subject that deals with my characters. I don't like to half-ass things when it comes to writing. I want to come off like I know what I'm talking about and actually know what I'm talking about.

I'm looking forward to the snow we're suppose to get tonight. I'm hoping for more than what's forecasted. :D

My Game Plan

2010-01-15T10:03:00.002-05:00

One of the most difficult things I've faced recently has been my attempt to make writing a habit, again. Starting any habit is difficult. As long as I can write about three paragraphs in one day, I feel like I've accomplished something great. And this is actually a good thing. No matter how much I happen to write during the day, at least it's something--something to keep me tied into the story.

At the moment, I'm working on MAY THE DEAD SPEAK, the first story in OF THE MOON AND SUN. This was the one I worked on this past NaNoWriMo, but I actually started working on it before EDEN. I think there was a total of four pages (1.5k words). When NaNoWriMo started, I went back and rewrote what I had, adding 10k. Of course, I was derailed in my NaNo attempt . . . life happens and I couldn't discipline myself into keeping my 2k a day word count. And when I mentally see a snowball picking up speed down the hill, I tend to buck under the pressure. So I mentally rebelled. But I'm back now, free from the pressure of a deadline; however, I have placed a new, albeit flexible, deadline on myself. By the end of February, I hope to have the first draft of MtDS finished. Next will be ROSLYN, the second story in the book (MOON & SUN).

I gave my stepdad a brief outline of the larger story within this series and where things are planned to go, and his reply was, "You've got a lot on your plate." But that's what I love. I love stories and characters that continue on after one book is finished. I love to immerse myself. I look at it like a TV series. There's so much I want to explore with these characters. I could never write a single book and end the characters and universe in one go-around. I can, however, read books like this.

My plans for this series . . . (Hopefully spoiler free.)

EDEN kicks off the rollercoaster. It's a large book, I'll admit to that, but I kept it moving fast. I also made a conscious effort to steer clear of heavy details in descriptions. I wanted to give the reader just enough to keep the coaster moving. I'm not doing this to write the next great American novel. I want to entertain! The book may end in a cliffhanger but things will be revisited soon.

OF THE MOON AND SUN begins with the story MAY THE DEAD SPEAK. It takes place during the events in EDEN, using characters introduced near the end of the book. ROSLYN is the second story in MOON & SUN and takes place two years before EDEN.

THE BROTHERHOOD is a glimpse at the villain in this story arc.

S.E.V.E.N. takes place in the 1870s and shows the beginnings of this powerful organization.

WISDOM OF A WARRIOR will contain two stories, each one delving into the history around two characters introduced in EDEN.

BLOODLINES will explore the past of two prominent characters in EDEN.

THEORY OF TRUTH is planned to contain two stories. The first one will explore the missing six months that happened to one of the characters. The second story, though introducing two new characters, will have lasting effects within the rest of the series.

SHADOWS AND SILHOUETTES will be two stories that take place right after EDEN. They will fill in the blanks left by the first novel in the series.

THE DIABOLICAL SYMPHONY picks up right where EDEN left off. Everything boils down to the chaos delivered to my beloved characters.

And this will be the end of the first story arc. The next story arc will pick up twenty years later, beginning with the book SOLACE.

Why do some of these books contain two stories? I feel that it organizes the series better, and some of these stories would be considered novellas if published alone. I also want to give my possible readers more for their money and support.

So yeah, I guess I do have a lot on my plate, and I haven't even factored in the stuff I want to do with FOUR CORNERS. In the long run, EDEN will probably contain much more than FC. Which is fine. FC is a whole different ball game.

I may not be seen as a professional writer to some (or even to myself), but I like to think of myself as a career writer. I love to do this. Good or not, this is me. I tell stories.

And to stay focused, I surround myself with everyday reminders.

Refocusing.

2010-01-09T14:47:00.003-05:00

Ever since I released EDEN last month, I've been trying to hunker down and begin working again. But I feel scattered. I want to work on FOUR CORNERS as well as EDEN. And in mentally going back and forth, I can't focus one-hundred percent on one project. So for the past few day I've been trying to shake myself clear from this fog. This process usually starts with me trying to steer clear of the internet. Most of my time and energy is squandered on frivolous things like Facebook, forums, and email. I miss the days when I didn't have 24/7 access to the internet. It's like a drug to me. While others can coexist with it, I have a difficult time. I believe this come from many different places within me. I've always said that I have ADHD (undiagnosed). I struggled in school--was overwhelmed in college, though I excelled in my art classes. I also have a problem with numbers. Math was my poorest subject. It's like a wall wraps around my brain when math is involved. I use to call it "Number Dyslexia," but I found out the other day that it's an actual disorder called "Dyscalculia." This is the answer I've been looking for. Too bad no one knew about it when I was growing up.

All of this "scatterbrain" stuff is magnified when the internet and procrastination are involved. I feel overwhelmed most of the time, therefore, I get nothing completed. I realize that the best way for me to work is the engulf myself in it completely. This past July, when I stayed at my grandmother's for a month, was like heaven. No internet, no cell phone, no real distractions. I wish everyday was like that--just me and my many characters swimming within my head. But I can't do that here. The internet is a constant presence. It's like a drug addict trying to get clean in a house filled with his/her drug of choice. Willpower is a fragile thing, more precious than gold or diamonds.

Perhaps I need to quit cold-turkey, or strictly limit myself to weekends in the form of one blog entry.

I need to pick one project and stick with it: EDEN or FOUR CORNERS? I'm having loads of fun with EDEN right now . . . Though I miss my FC characters. Ahhhhh!!! *rips out her hair*

To battle perfectionism, this entry will remain imperfect.

*poof*

Eden is released!

2009-12-24T23:45:00.007-05:00

After years and years of working on and off, I am calling the First Edition of "Eden" complete!

You can find more information at my website and Lulu store.
http://eden.hauntedstudio.net
http://stores.lulu.com/theghost

Vampires, werewolves, and . . . zombies?! Oh my! (Actually, the whole zombie thing doesn't happen until later in the series.)

To give a little background on the book, there is no romantic thing going on between a human or vampire (or werewolf). The story is more about a sheltered daughter and her overprotective father. If you are looking for something similar to "Twilight," this book will disappoint you. If you are looking for something similar to "Underworld," this book will disappoint you. If you are looking for anything that has been done to death . . . hell, this is a vampire story, hasn't everything in this genre been done to death? Uh, that was a rhetorical question.

As I have said before, writing about vampires isn't a new thing to me, but sharing my story(s) with others . . . Needless to say, it feels a little personal, as though I am allowing others to read a private journal of mine. I have been a vampire fan myself ever since my mother let me watch the 1979 Dracula movie when I was four years old. It was all downhill from there. Little did she know what she created that night. :)

I love horror. I love the three "G"s: Gruesome, gory, and grotesque. And throughout all of this, gingerbread men give me the creeps. Except for Gingy from "Shrek." He's pretty cool.

If you don't already know, you can follow me on Facebook and Twitter, as well.
http://www.facebook.com/#/pages/Devin-Blake/189849534330
http://twitter.com/JulieDevin

*poof*

Moving ahead.

2009-12-04T10:50:00.002-05:00

I'm looking at publishing EDEN through Lulu and CreateSpace (as well as Kindle). The editing is pretty much complete. Anymore and I may rip my hair out. So if there are any typos, they'll have to stay. The perfectionist side of me is screaming right now, but I need to do this. Nothing is perfect, and to dwell on perfection will leave me with the notion, "If it can't be perfect, then I won't release it!"

I need to be more confident in myself. I need to not fear bad reviews. Heck, even the most well-known and popular authors have their share of bad reviews. I have to remember that they are their opinions, and like butts, everyone has one.

The final page count is 628. I haven't received the proof with the new layout, but I'm hoping it will look all right. *crosses fingers*

Eden's release date!

2009-11-30T12:20:00.003-05:00

Though I don't have a set date at the moment, I plan to release EDEN before 2010. I won't be writing much in the upcoming months. I need to take a break from the grueling world of prose and focus more on art.

http://haloghost.wordpress.com

I plan to be posting there regularly as I begin the ground work to my FOUR CORNERS Artbook.

The National Novel Writing Month didn't go so well this time. I think I burned myself out with a year of solid writing. I did end up with a word count of 27,862.

*poof*

Labor of Love.

2009-08-30T09:55:00.005-04:00

(Somewhat cross-posted from my LiveJournal.)

I finished the first draft of EDEN on August 28th. I began working on this story back in 2002 (outlines and such), but didn't officially start writing until 2004 (for the National Novel Writing Month).

Here's the breakdown:
3 Parts
91 Chapters
221,820 Words
Rated R for all of the blood 'n guts fun! :D

In MS Word, with Palatino Linotype at 12 pt, the page count is 576. In my current InDesign template for the book, the page count stands at 695. @_@ I have some serious tinkering to do with fonts, spacing, leading, and all that jazz. I expect the page count to change (hopefully drop). I'm going with Minion Pro for my body text, and I spent a good chunk of time designing my own ellipse. I was hoping to find a better/easier way to do that. Yeah, those ellipses I see in other books are nothing like the standard one I see in Word. And Justified and line breaks don't like *period*space*period**space*period*. But I now have a nice, well-spaced ellipse, fashioned after the Minion Pro font.

So the madness of editing has now begun. I've learned in the past that I can't be too over-critical of my work. I need to read it as though I didn't write it. If not, I'll be pulling my hair out by Chapter 4. September has become DeEdMo (Devin's Editing Month). Hehehe, deedmo. I have the book broken down and printed out in three binders. I'm hoping that things will go smoothly. I would LOVE to have a beta reader, but I don't want to bother anyone with a book they won't like. *sigh*

Everyone around me has been trying to talk me into making this book three books, instead of one book with three parts. I try to tell them why it can't be broken up like that. But their usual response is, "Tolkien wanted his Lord of the Rings trilogy to be one book, but was talked out of it by his publisher." It's true that I planned for EDEN to two books, but this all changed while I was writing. These three parts, in my eyes, aren't enough to stand alone as individual books. Or I can turn this around an look at it differently; buy one book, get two free, and all are neatly bound for your convenience!

When I finally publish this one, instead of having a two chapter excerpt, I plan to post the first part. That's 34 chapters for free! However, if you want to read more... >:)

I've spent too much time writing this rambling mess. Time to go do something productive.

*poof*

The Art of Style

2009-06-04T09:02:00.017-04:00

Last night I was cruising the internet (a result of severe procrastination) and was looking for something to jump start my writing gears. I stumbled upon a book that apparently every writer should read. I didn’t know it was a prerequisite to writing, yet everywhere I looked, people have been singing its praises. So I looked up The Elements Of Style. It is a nice reference book for grammar, and even gives advice on what to avoid when writing. I now know that I have an issue with adverbs. That's right, I abuse adverbs. Example: "She mindlessly wrote on the paper." Change to; "She wrote on the paper, her mind void of all thought." I know, terrible example. But this brings me to my subject here: The Art of Style.

It's all about personal taste. In my previous entry, I mentioned an incident with a co-worker of mine. While I was hurt at what he said about my writing, he was being honest. He thought it needed work because it wasn't how he would write it.

I've been a fan of anime since I was fifteen (Japanese animation, for those who don't know). This was back before the popularity it has now. And when I began drawing in that style, I got plenty of "Why draw like that? It's not your own style." But what was hard for me to tell them was the different styles within the world of anime and manga. All they saw were the large eyes, pointy noses, and wild hair. Any anime/manga fan knows the difference between CLAMP, Masamune Shirow, Kouta Hirano, Kōsuke Fujishima, Hayao Miyazaki, and Akira Toriyama. But from the outside looking in, it all looks the same to those unfamiliar. This is why I get frustrated when people compare authors, saying that one author's style of writing is better than another's.

Would this be acceptable in the world of art? The beauty of art is its diversity. I can honestly say that I'm not a fan of Salvador Dali. His work creeps me out. I respect him as an artist, but his work is something that doesn't appeal to me. This doesn't mean I will create an online community devoted to bashing his works. And yet this happens to authors all the time it seems. I can understand when someone doesn't like a book, but with the power of the internet, all of these people can get together and talk about why they dislike the book and turn the author into a villain. This isn't the book clubs I remember. These people can be vicious, even targeting fans of the book(s). I see this happening with Stephenie Meyer. It seems that the more popular a book becomes, the more people line up to voice their hate. I will say right now that I'm not a fan of TWILIGHT. I have loved vampires since I was a child, but I had no interest in this story. Her style of writing and plot weren't for me. Even though I disliked her take on vampires, she took something common and made it her own...sparkles and all. I can also respect the fact that she wrote this for herself first and foremost. It's time to let sleeping dogs lie. We all see things differently. There's no need to scream it from the mountain tops or online.

But it is easier to look at a piece of artwork, voice your opinion, and move on to the next piece. Perhaps it is because books have more to say that send people to passionately voice their opinions.

"My main goal is to entertain myself." If I can have fun being a storyteller to myself, then my job is done. But if others are entertained as well, I will gladly welcome them with open arms. It is all about the story and the characters to me. The style of the writing is merely the tracks on which this train will glide across.

I have told this to many people in the past: I feel like a storyteller pretending to be a writer. I have never seen a defining line that separated me as a daydreamer and an author. The stories I write are more like ongoing daydreams. *laughs* My books are my daydream journals.

As the saying goes, "A picture is worth a thousand words." It's all about finding the right words, I guess. And if the situation calls for it, less is more.

Throughout my procrastination attack last night, I stumbled upon another book. This one was by Stephen King. He talks about his life experiences and even the method to his madness. Again, the whole abusing adverbs thing was talked about. Okay, I get it. Words ending with "ly" are bad. But they do have their place in writing. I promise to use them sparingly from now on. And that's another point I was hoping to make. Styles are a living thing. They change as the author writes or as the artist paints. I can already look back at FC1 and see how much my writing has changed. Though I'm tempted to "update" my style in the book, I need to focus on my future stories. I need to grow and not dwell on the past.

Time to get inspired. Time to start writing. Time to create. Time to look at things differently.

My Biggest Fear

2009-05-27T09:33:00.007-04:00

I have always suffered from a fear of criticism. If someone says anything negative about something I have created, I tend to take it personally. I'm left feeling crushed. I don't have a thick skin. So when I recieved the email from Lulu saying that they have added my book (FC1) to Amazon.com, I was struck with the biggest wave of dread I have ever known. Amazon?! With reviews?! No. Not me. I've read the many negative reviews people leave on books that I like. These people can be ruthless. That's one reason why I have the reviews disabled on my books listed at Lulu. Ignorance is bliss.

Several years back, I was sitting at an outdoor table during my break at work, editing my book. A co-worker happened to be on his break, as well, and looked over my shoulder. I've known him to take an interest in writing, but this guy had a strong arrogance about him that rubbed me the wrong way since day one. I want to say that he had a superiority complex. In his mind, he could do no wrong. As he skimmed over the page I was editing, he remarked, "Good, but needs work." My stomach sank. Needs work?! The nerve of him! He has no idea how many times I've gone over this! The rest of the day, I wondered how good he was at writing. Eventually, he sent me a piece of fan fiction he was writing. Wow. And he thought my stuff needed work? Three paragraphs in, my mind had no idea what was going on. Too much description, so little personality, and no pacing at all. He asked what I thought about it. I replied, "It's a nice start." This incident has stuck with me all of these years. Looking back at it now, I can see where his remark came from. We have two different styles. I don't write the way he writes, or how he thinks it should be written. It's almost like watching a movie and wishing for different cinematography. This is why I always love to say, "It is easier to criticize than create."

Now that Lulu is selling my book on Amazon.com, I have re-added the book in Kindle form. I know what I said in a previous post of mine. But it's time to stop letting my fear control me. I hate being afraid. When I found out about the Amazon posting, I told my mom and stepdad about my fear, and my stepdad actually (playfully) said, "If you take it down, I will slap you! I have never seen someone who thinks so negatively about themselves." I try to be positive, but I have no confidence in myself to think like that.

In fear of any negative reviews, I have forbidden myself to look at my book on Amazon.com. My inferiority complex demands it.

Ignorance is bliss.

Method to My Madness

2009-05-21T08:37:00.017-04:00

I have this problem. Every time I go to the store, I have to buy a notebook. Not just any notebook, but a nice 5 subject, college ruled notebook. Five Star, Omni, Exceed, and No Boundaries are my top favorites. I think it’s an addiction. If I leave the store without one, I get this nagging feeling in the back of my mind.

Why do I love notebooks? They are the tools of my method. Growing up, I had oodles of stories I began but never finished. If an idea came to me, I sat down and wrote everything as though I was reading a book. These early attempts of mine always ended in failure. Then an idea blossomed forth. Rather than writing a book, I began outlining. As long as I kept the ideas flowing, the longer my interest in the story lasted. So now every time I see a fresh notebook, my skin tingles with the story possibilities and the journey that may follow. Perhaps that is why I feel the need to buy a notebook each time I go to the store. Leaving without one is like turning my back on the possibilities.

I also love buying three-ring binders. These simple guys contain my freshly printed chapters. I look at each completed chapter like a miniature goal. It’s an odd way to look at writing, but the method keeps me focused on my current project. The four binders you see are my current manuscripts. From top to bottom: Four Corners: Masquerade, Four Corners: Forever, Four Corners: Legend, and Eden. The top three are finished works, while the bottom contains only the first two parts of Eden. I’m afraid that Eden will be over the 740 page cutoff for the 6” x 9” book at Lulu. But that’s with the current template I made for my first two published books. I may have to rework things. *sigh* But InDesign to me is like a fine sable hair brush to an inker. I don’t think I could’ve survived the layout process with Microsoft Word. I may not be a professional by any means, but I love to pretend.

I’ll end this post with a pic of my desk.

*poof*

P-Day!

2009-05-19T08:30:00.012-04:00

Yes, it is P-Day! The publishing day for my second book FOUR CORNERS: FOREVER. Such a long, hard road, but the day is finally here. However, unlike my first book, I didn't have a beta reader this time around. The two beta readers I had lined up bailed on me at the last minute. Such is the downfall of a busy life. So instead of pushing back the release date, I'm throwing caution to the wind and embracing the imperfection side.

I am a perfectionist. There, I said it. And one of my self-treatments is to allow imperfections in my life. It's to show more of a human side, though others may see it as laziness. But I've learned the hard way not to dwell on a project for too long.

Back in August 2000, I began writing FOUR CORNERS and posting the completed chapters online. It was the start of a very long journey. On March 9, 2004, I made the painful decision to remove my stories from the internet in hopes to one day see them in print. Thus began the next leg of my journey.

After searching for any and all information on how to get published, I knew I had one option: traditional publishing. You see, there's a stigma out there. Most people view self-publishing as vanity publishing. Vanity publishing is different from what I'm doing. I'm not paying to have my book published. I made the mistake in the past to contact Xlibris. Now they won't leave me alone even after I told them I was no longer interested. A vanity press will publish anything as long as the author pays for it. They're goal is to market to the author and not the public who would buy the books. On the flip side to this coin, you have self-publishing. Everything, right down to the size and type of font, is a decision of the author. The downside is that the author must promote their own works.

In my early searching, I looked down on self-publishing, grouping it together with vanity publishing. This oversight locked my eyes onto the cutthroat world of traditional publishing. It's a ruthless beast. I had two options at this point, look for publishers willing to take a look at an unpublished author or seek out an agent. I chose the first option. And my target? Mundania Press LLC. I took my time and did everything by the book. I wanted to look as professional as possible. I wanted them to see that I knew what I was doing. So I sent them my submission and was told to wait 120 (or longer) for a reply. I waited...and waited. Many months later I sent them a inquiry about my submission. Within the week, I received the dreaded "We regret to inform you..." blah, blah, blah.

Then I took a step back. The chances of me landing a publishing contract without an agent would be like winning the lottery. As I stood thus far, I wasn't a very lucky person. Okay, time to get an agent, right? With my new plan, I happily skipped off to the nearest bookstore to buy the "Guide to Literary Agents." I scoured the book, looking over the slew of advice. I even settled on the first agent I wanted to send my query letter to. Once again, I made everything as professional as possible. Ah, yes, the Writer's House. If I wanted to aim high, I wanted it to be the highest in the publishing land. I didn't want to think about rejection, but I kept it in the back of my mind, something to cushion the blow when I received the rejection letter. Again, I waited. Perhaps I would be one of the lucky ones this time. The SASE returned with a letter--the letter I knew I would see, "I am unable to off you representation..." At least it wasn't a copy and paste email. I now have a nice rejection letter to save for years to come.

You would think that two rejections would be a nice start to a long journey. But I didn't want to sit around and send off letter after letter, in hopes of one day winning the lottery. No. If I want to see my dreams happen, I will be the one in the driver's seat, and not some company/agency who will take my labor of love and do with it as they please. I even feared what my book would look like if it were printed. Would I like the cover? Would they force me to edit out things? Would they allow my work to be bastardized into some cheesy movie that will one day appear on the SciFi Channel? Gah! Make it stop! But there was a way to see everything how I envisioned it. Self-publishing.

All right! My journey takes a strange turn. I began looking at self-publishing with a different set of eyes. I could have my cake, decorate it how I wanted, and even eat it too. Wow! Why didn't I do this before? However, I still see the stigma. It looks like I gave up on traditional publishing, which actually I have, but I see this as a more "organic" part of the creation process. It's like creating a quilt by hand. Sure, there maybe flaws in the finished product, but there's a warmth to it that no factory-made quilt can match. It is that personal touch; the brush strokes on a painting, the thumb print on a sculpture, and the fact someone poured their time and love into this project. It is all them. This is all me.

Now it's time to promote my latest publishing venture. As of now, FOUR CORNERS: FOREVER (FC2) is available for purchase. Remember, this is Book Two in the series. If you haven't read the first book, things won't make much sense in this one, though I try to fill in a little of the back story.

http://stores.lulu.com/theghost

The first draft of FC3 is finished, and will be published sometime next year. Why the long wait? I'm currently working on another series at the moment. I don't have a name for this series yet. I'm still hesitant to call it the "Eden Series," but I find myself saying it anyway. The website has been up for a while now, though not much has changed. This series is a little more personal to me, and that's the main reason I've been debating on whether or not to publish it at all.

http://hauntedstudio.net/eden

I have been working on this series for as long as I've fiddled around with FOUR CORNERS. But the time has come to focus all of my attention on this project. The first book will (hopefully) be released this October. I foresee a summer filled with mind-numbing editing.

I am first and foremost a fan of horror. Even my fantasy writings have a tinge of the horror element. EDEN will not be a young adult novel. (And even though FOUR CORNERS may seem like a YA series as well, it is not.) I write for myself. I want to entertain myself. And if I can entertain others, that will be a happy and welcome side-effect.

EDEN kicks off a series filled with werewolves, vampires, necromancers, and of course, zombies--everything I have loved since childhood. Yes, I was a strange child. This series has been

years in the making. I'm not the type of writer to dream up an idea and churn out a book within months, then move onto the next project. I like my ideas to sit and meld into a nice stew. I want to get all the wrinkles out of my quilt before I allow others to snuggle into it.

I did venture into the world of Amazon's Kindle once. But in fear of bad reviews, I have taken down my work. I know, I know, bad reviews come with the territory. But I have a thin skin. I take everything personally. If someone says something bad about my work, I'll be crushed. Writing is a personal love of mine, and allowing others to read my writings...it makes me nervous as hell. It’s like putting your heart and soul into a beautiful painting, and then having to brave those unforgiving art critics. But writing is a little bit different. Much more time and effort goes into the final manuscript, time an artist can spend painting a dozen masterpieces or more. And this is why I’m always hesitant when allowing others to read my work.

Art is in the eye of the beholder.
A great story is in the heart of the writer.

Support Indie Authors!

(To battle my perfectionist side, I refuse to correct the typos or grammar mistakes in this post.)

Meow, meow.

2009-04-07T00:47:00.000-04:00

Yo! Just another blog of mine. I plan to focus this one on my writing.